The Enneagram
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How To Care For And Love
Each Enneagram Type
Learn how to show love to each enneagram types and how they love others.
What is the Enneagram?
The Enneagram (Ennea=9, Gram=Diagram) is a map for self-discovery and personal development based on nine basic personality types. It is a tool that offers insight to individuals, couples, and groups by identifying the core elements that motivate us all. Enneagram training provides a greater understanding of why we act and react the way we do and empowers us to take responsibility for our behaviors and growth.
The journey of the Enneagram uncovers the uniqueness of each person and his or her journey. It not only reveals what holds us back but also guides us toward empowerment and freedom by connecting us to who we were created to be. It allows us to be present and opens the path to achieving our dreams with confidence.
The power of the Enneagram is its ability to expose and transform self-limiting behaviors and beliefs into life-enhancing personal growth. It shows not just what we do but why we do it, or why we repeat a particular pattern of behavior. This allows for deeper insight into becoming healthier versions of ourselves.
The gift of the Enneagram is that it can provide a greater understanding of ourselves and how we relate to others. It can provide insights to help us create and sustain meaningful, lasting relationships with God, others, and ourselves.
“Enneagram is not meant to put you in a box. It is meant to help you see your box, so you can be freed from it.”
-Richard Rohr
More than a Single Point
The Enneagram offers a rich map to self-awareness and personal development from an open systems perspective. It does not box in people, but rather opens a pathway to self-discovery by separating personality traits into nine distinct types. See diagram below.
Each number on the Enneagram denotes one type. It is common to find a little of yourself in all nine, although one usually stands out as your basic personality type.
Because individuals are more complex and unique than nine simple types, the Enneagram has multiple layers. These layers can be broken down as follows:
- Nine primary types
- Eighteen wing types
- Three subtypes
- Tri-type styles
- Three Centers of Intelligence
The Enneagram symbol is a visual representation of how personality types interact with one another. The circle shows our commonality: we all have each of the nine personality types within us. We just have one to a greater degree than the others. It also shows how we are influenced by a type adjacent to us (wing) on the circle.
Because individuals are more complex and unique than nine simple types, the Enneagram has multiple layers. These layers can be broken down as follows:
- Nine primary types
- Eighteen wing types
- Three subtypes
- Tri-type styles
- Three Centers of Intelligence
The Enneagram symbol is a visual representation of how personality types interact with one another. The circle shows our commonality: we all have each of the nine personality types within us. We just have one to a greater degree than the others. It also shows how we are influenced by a type adjacent to us (wing) on the circle.
Wings
Although there are only nine primary types, each personality is further modified by its “wing,” the type adjacent to each primary type that informs an individual’s motivations and behaviors.
Wings are the two numbers directly next to each Main Type on the Enneagram diagram. While we use the characteristics of the Type on each side of our main type, we will always remain in our Main Type with core motivations. Everyone uses their wings to a varying degree, and differently in various circumstances. We can access our wings as needed.
In addition, personalities are influenced by the paths of integration and of stress, by our development and alignment with God or higher self, and by instinctual variants. Thus, each of us is truly unique, and our identity with the Enneagram is equally so.
The lines demonstrate something most of us have experienced but perhaps never named: how our personality changes under different circumstances. We exhibit traits of another personality type in times of stress (with the arrow) and in times of rest (against the arrow).
Paths
At first glance, the diagram of the Enneagram can be confusing, but the lines and arrows have meaning. The lines on the diagram demonstrate something most of us have experienced but perhaps never named: our personality changes under different circumstances. We exhibit traits of another personality type in times of stress and growth (rest). These are referred to as our paths.
Paths we access:
- Growth path
- Stress path
- Blind spot path
- Converging path
For example, a Nine will take on some of the healthy characteristics of a three (demonstrated by the arrow leading to a three) and a Nine can take on the unhealthy characteristics of a six (demonstrated by the arrow leading to the six).
Your Enneagram Journey
As you embark on your journey of self-discovery, be patient and gracious with yourself. Finding your Enneagram type can take time. It is a difficult task to peel back layers of behaviors, ask why we do what we do, and pursue self-improvement and new dreams.
Though sometimes difficult, the path is beautiful and the journey is worth it.